


Sheol

by Lise



Category: Avatar: The Last Airbender
Genre: F/M, Gen, Post-Canon, Siblings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-05-02
Updated: 2012-05-02
Packaged: 2017-11-04 17:13:28
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,255
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/396233
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lise/pseuds/Lise
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Zuko visits Azula.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Sheol

For a while, he considered making the journey in disguise, or else not making it at all. Eventually he decided that, whatever else, he owed her this. 

The room she was kept in was little more than a cell, and Zuko felt a twinge looking at the door. “She will be restrained,” said one of the healers at his elbow. “For your safety.” Zuko nodded, and the healer hesitated. “Perhaps someone should…”

“I’d like to talk to her alone.” He made his voice more firm than he really felt. But this was important. Necessary. She was still his sister.

“Understood, Fire Lord.”

The door was locked rather than triggered by bending, and Zuko stood back as the healer opened the door before stepping through. It closed with a strange sort of finality behind him, and despite himself, Zuko couldn’t help but feel just a little bit afraid. 

Azula was sitting on the bed, which looked comfortable but plain. Which described the whole room, actually. Azula herself looked…different. Her hair hung loose and looked unwashed. Her eyes were lowered as if in submission, and her hands were clasped in her lap as though she were oblivious to the soft cuffs holding her down. 

Zuko wished he trusted her enough to take them off. 

He cleared his throat, roughly. “Azula?” He said, carefully. For a long moment, she didn’t look up. When she did, he was startled by her eyes. Red-rimmed and curiously – _hollow._

“Zuzu,” she said, and her smile, at least, was as razor-edged as ever. “So you descended to see me. I wondered if you would.” Zuko shifted, uncomfortably. 

“I don’t want to leave you here forever.”

Her eyes seemed to glitter. She said nothing, just looked at him. Then she said, “Mother never loved you. She pitied you.”

“I want to help you,” Zuko said, and heard the touch of imploring in his own voice. Azula would hear it too. She sneered. 

“Help me,” she said. “You, my pathetic brother? There is nothing I want from you.”

Mai had told him not to bother to come, Zuko remembered. Told him, with a glimmer of something like shame in her dark eyes. Mai was so often right. He sighed. “I’ll come back,” he said. “See you again.” 

Azula’s eyes were almost slitted when she looked up at him from the bed. “Mother’s dead,” she said, sleek and venomous. “You’re the only one that doesn’t know.”

Zuko left with perhaps less composure than he should have.

* * *

“She would have killed you,” Mai said. With a flare of that so uncommonly seen rage. 

“She’s probably planning something even now,” Sokka opined suspiciously. Katara (visiting with Aang) just frowned at him in what was almost effective detterent by itself. They were all right, of course. He knew that. 

He just also had to wonder if there wasn’t something he could have done differently. She was his _sister._ Wasn’t he supposed to look after her?

He went back. 

When Zuko stepped into Azula’s room she was reclining on the bed, as perfectly relaxed as she would have been in her own room. He could just see lines of tension around her mouth, her eyes. “Is father still alive?” she asked, before he could speak. 

Zuko gaped, speechless. “What do you think I am?” he said, horrified. “Of course he’s still alive. He can’t…can’t bend anymore.” He didn’t know how Aang had done what he had, and didn’t really want to ask. 

Azula sounded bored. “You should have killed him. A better ruler would know that.”

He wouldn’t let her get to him. He _wouldn’t._ “He’s still my – our father.”

“He would have killed you. If Azulon hadn’t died.” Zuko’s fists clenched. 

“What do you want?”

Azula smiled. Zuko could feel anger itching at his insides and took a deep breath, looking away from her. When he glanced back, he could see it again, just barely. The tension vibrating through her body. The lines around her mouth. (The shadows around her eyes.)

“Do you want to go outside?” He offered, impulsively, and her head jerked up and she looked at him with such pure disdain Zuko felt like he was the one imprisoned. 

“From a traitor like you,” she said, “I want nothing.”

* * *

Staring at the ceiling with Mai curled up next to him, Zuko could feel her frowning. “Ty Lee went to visit her,” she said, suddenly. “And left crying. Azula always knew how to make Ty Lee cry. Even when she felt bad about it afterwards.”

Zuko noticed how Mai still never said Azula’s name. “Will you ever go to see her?” He asked. 

“I’m still too angry.” Zuko waited, and finally she sighed. “Yeah, probably. Eventually. It wasn’t all bad.” She turned her head to look at him. “Still. You need to stop feeling guilty. You did what you had to.”

“I was always jealous,” Zuko said. “Maybe I didn’t…maybe I wasn’t as close to her as I should have been.”

“She’s not close to anyone,” Mai said bluntly. “She wouldn’t let herself be.”

* * *

When Zuko went back again, Azula’s face was streaked with red and slightly puffy, blotchy. Zuko gaped at her for a moment, bewildered. (He didn’t think he’d _ever_ seen Azula cry.) “Azula?” he said, hesitantly. 

She did not turn to look at him. “I am bored,” she said. 

“I don’t want you to be here,” Zuko said, carefully. “I just can’t trust you. You understand that, right?” He wanted to apologize. Wanted to ask _her_ if he’d done something wrong. Didn’t want to know what she would say if he asked. 

“Then why do you _come?_ ” She challenged, and for all her face was puffy and tear-streaked her eyes were fierce. “To gloat?” 

“No! Why would you-” He knew the answer before he finished, and she narrowed her eyes at him. 

“It’s what I would do,” she said, coolly. “Come to stare at poor, mad, Azula. Do you think this is my comeuppance?” 

“I don’t-”

“What did I do wrong,” Azula demanded. Zuko stared blankly at her. “What did I do wrong,” she said, more loudly, more clearly. “Other than be better than you?” 

Zuko felt a twinge and wasn’t sure if it was anger or guilt. Azula pulled her knees into her chest suddenly and looked so much smaller. So much younger. 

“I’m sorry,” Zuko said, and his own voice sounded slightly strangled. 

“For what?” Azula demanded. “And no. It’s like you said to me. You’re not.”

“I _am-_ ”

“I don’t want to see you again.” She paused. Her voice was perfectly level. “Ty Lee can come if she wants to.”

“I just want to help you,” Zuko said, not quite plaintively. She did not look at him. 

“No,” she said simply. “You don’t.” He stood there for a moment, not sure what he was waiting for. Finally, Azula said, “I lied about mother. I don’t know where she is. Nobody does.”

Zuko nodded. He took a step back toward the door. Azula opened her mouth and he paused, thinking she was going to say something, maybe _if you find her will you tell her to come see me?_

But she closed her mouth without speaking, and turned her back resolutely on Zuko. He slipped out and didn’t look back. _I’m sorry,_ he thought about saying, but didn’t know what he’d be apologizing for, and did know that she would only throw it back in his face. 

When the door closed, he thought he could hear her singing softly.


End file.
